Getting out of alcohol addiction

Why am I lying in an emergency ambulance?

 

I called 119 ten minutes ago. I told the paramedics over the phone that I was feeling dizzy and my chest was tight because of alcohol, and I needed to go to the emergency room.

 

I have been living as an alcoholic for ten years, and whenever I drank for a few days, I would voluntarily go to a specialized alcohol treatment hospital and admit myself.

 

However, on this day, perhaps preferring to be hospitalized in a general hospital rather than an alcohol hospital, I called 119. Since I had just been discharged from the alcohol hospital, re-admission would have been embarrassing.

 

I have lived like that for 10 years. Alcohol treatment hospitals, general psychiatric hospitals, prayer houses... I think I was hospitalized long-term or on convalescence at least once a year.

 

However, I have been living without long-term hospitalization for two years. When I crave alcohol, I settle with a can of convenience store beer.

 

In fact, it is impossible to shed the stigma of being an alcoholic. Just as once a Marine, always a Marine, once an alcoholic, one must live as an alcoholic forever.

 

So I am currently an alcoholic. However, I am functioning like a normal person.

 

The secret to living a normal life is simple.

 

First, I do not believe in my own will to abstain from alcohol. Therefore, I visit a specialized alcohol treatment hospital every month for counseling and medication prescriptions.

 

Secondly, I generally avoid group gatherings or company dinners. Even if I do attend, I leave the table first after the meal.

 

Third, since I have been passionately practicing table tennis for the past five years, I feel like I am gradually drifting away from alcohol.

 

Fourth, although my faith rarely improves, I am living a new life through religious practice.

 

My secret to health...

However, I am still an alcoholic.